Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Misadventures in Home Improvement #3

With paint in hand and two mostly cooperative helpers, we got down to it!



(note the drip coming off his roller, landing who-knows-where while he pauses to pose)


By about noon, we nearly had 2 full gallons on the wall, but it was clear that we were going to need a second coat.


Jeff and I started on the second coat while we sent the young lad to the store with an empty gallon to get more of the same.


Bryce calls from the store:

“It’s going to take a little longer, they have to custom match the paint.”

“Um.  What do you mean they have to custom match the paint?  It’s a stock color, they should just be able to read the bar code and…”


“Well, they did that, but I could tell that it didn’t match.  I told the guy to look at the paint all over my arm—it’s supposed to look like THAT.”

Says my color-blind son.

Seriously, he’s color-blind.

But he could tell it was the wrong color.

I would have been proud of his problem solving skills if I weren’t so busy being sick to my stomach.

Because this is what I figured out:  the first two gallons were in fact some mystery color—an imposter to my perfect color.   Some catastrophic mishap at the paint mixing station—2 drops of yellow where there should have been green—I don’t know.  The gallon that Bryce had mixed (originally) was in fact the true perfect color…2 gallons ago.  Oh, the horror!

I cried.

Real tears.

It was devastating.

Because when you’ve just edged a fairly spacious bed-vanity combo, you get kind of put out by doing so with the wrong, totally imperfect color.

I had noticed it was different that morning.  I attributed it to not having 2 coats or not being completely dry.

But I trusted that dratted bar code.

How could the bar code be so wrong?

Jeff dried my tears and we decided to continue painting the 2nd coat with the ugly absolutely hideous paint-matched gallon Bryce brought home.

We reasoned that perhaps after it dried overnight and I slept on it then maybe I wouldn’t feel quite so…betrayed.

Next Chapter

  • Paint matching is kind of an overstatement.
  • My knight in shining armor slays a dragon.
  • Maybe I shouldn’t be managing the family’s finances.

Thursday, August 14, 2014

Misadventures in Home Improvement #2

Did I say two months?  Ok, maybe 3.  I’m sure you’re bored with the story by now.  Oh well, this is for my mom cuz she still reads me.

It all started with this:


I saw this duvet set in a catalog.

I put the catalog in my save-on-my-desk-think-about pile.

I’m a ponderer by nature (hence the months between blog posts).

My process is this:  if I’m still thinking about it by the time I find it in that mess, I order it.  If not, it goes into the trashcan. It’s a pretty good system. 

Except.  Not if you want it to still be on sale and in stock when you order.

And of course, because it’s not in stock,



(It must be really good since so many people already bought it, duh.)

And so it’s out of stock.  For some reason, the online catalog would not allow me to just back order it.  Instead, there was a date listed when it would be available again.  In about 6 weeks.

So I waited, and on the appointed day, I logged in.  No luck.  Day after day, I checked back.  When it finally became available about 10 days later, I was ready with credit card in hand!


When it came, I put it right on my bed to admire my beautiful room.

But those cotton-picking walls ruined all of my enjoyment.

Instead of transforming my room, the beauty of the duvet was totally washed out. The unfinished, unpainted, imperfect walls stared accusingly back at me.

It was time to make a decision:  pay to have them re-textured or paint and hope for the best.

Painting seemed the easiest (and cheapest).  The walls certainly could not look worse.


Paint is a big decision.  Life changing.  Do not undersell it.  One must have the exact right color of blue gray.  Not too light, not too dark.  What is the mood it sets?  What are the color undertones?

And I’ve been wrong before.  Remember THIS?

Paint selection takes 10 days and three trips to the home improvement store, minimum.

And if I ask for your opinion, don’t be fooled.  I don’t really want it.

Painting day had arrived.  Memorial Day.  I was at the paint counter at 6:30 am with my paint chip in hand.

I was absolutely positive it was the EXACT right color.

to be continued…